Nancy, when I first read your article, I thought about it for some time, because it also reveals important choices parents and children make to find a place and balance in their lives. Also, I understand that inclusion is important to you. At 10, Casey seems to have learned something valuable: to accept himself and do it his way, without or without a group.

As one totally uninterested in competitive sports, I’ve learned to listen to grandchildren who share tales of scores, maneuvers, whatever, but what I look for is whether they enjoyed what they were doing. Competition often drives people more than mastery & pleasure in “just doing.” Our culture is drowning in competitiveness in school, work, accomplishments, appearance accompanied by the wish to win over others. Marching to one’s tune, or as Joseph Campbell put it, “Finding your own bliss” is closer to my version of excellence and loving what one does. And, Casey seems to be on that path!